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Jeremy Allen White has been fairly secretive about his personal life. This includes his relationship with his two children, Ezer and Dolores, and his wife, actor Addison Timlin. But he has been open about how winning Timlin's heart was one of the craziest things he's done as well as how his own demons could have derailed his career.
During Addison Timlin's recent interview on the Funny In Failure Podcast with host Michael Kahan, the Californication and Submission star shed light on her own troubles. But through having her two children with Allen White, Timlin has come to terms with the traumas from her own childhood.
Inside Addison Timlin's Childhood Trauma While Starring In "Annie"
Addison Timlin began her acting career at eight years old on the National Tour of the acclaimed musical "Annie". For the first little while, Timlin switched roles, playing numerous orphans in the traveling stage show. But eventually, she earned the titular role... and this changed her life. To put it simply, because of "Annie", Timlin did not have a traditional childhood.
"Being out of school and not having a normal relationship with other kids, there's like drawbacks to it, of course. And I had a lot of -- there was a lot of grief in there," Addison Timlin admitted on the Funny In Failure Podcast. "But as tough as that was, the Californication actor claimed that it, as well as the fan reaction, wasn't the dominant feeling."
"I lived for the 120 minutes in between," she said of her time actually being on stage.
The same was true when she was taking various movie and TV show roles in her teenage years.
But what really affected Timlin in a detrimental way was the negative reviews. Of course, her performance garnered a positive reaction, but since she was traveling from city to city, every week provided her with a new set of reviews. And that included negative ones.
"I was 9 years old, but I was very serious about my profession and knew very well that people were paying money and they were taking time off from work," Timlin said to Michael Kahan. "I read reviews religiously. And it would absolutely destroy me. And my 9-year-old, little body, whose trying so hard to do their best... it really did torture me."
Timlin admitted that "even to this day" they are ingrained in her brain. "I was traumatized by it, in a lot of ways. [But] I was motivated by it, in a lot of ways."
But while all of this weighed heavily on Timlin, she admitted that she has an easier time with it now. Mostly because she's been acting for twenty years and become "used to it". Additionally, she has a lot more empathy for herself and the choices she made as a child.
"You sort of untangle the knots of trauma in your life as you get older, and I think that's part of why the reviews don't really mean very much to me [now]," Addison Timlin said.
Having Children With Jeremy Allen White Healed Addison Timlin
"Having children changes everything in your life and the lens through which you see things," Addison Timlin said during her interview with Michael Kahan on his excellent podcast, Funny In Failure. "It's really an opportunity to heal yourself in a lot of ways [including] how you treat yourself. And how you'd expect or hope your children to be treated. And how you'd hope and expect them to treat themselves as well."
Timlin went on to address what's happened to her career since having kids. Given all of her early high-profile roles, her image, and her raw talent, it's not exactly surprising that her fans wonder why she hasn't been working as much. While the Fallen star has struggled with the competition of the business, she also stopped pursuing work in order to raise her family.
"I've taken a significant amount of time off from working and pursuing work," Timlin admitted.
A lot of the success she had in her teens and early twenties is attributed to her drive. But her desires altered as she hit her mid-twenties.
"I really, really wanted to just take a break, and start a family, and have kids, and be a mom," she added. "It changes your world and your life. My favorite soundbite I can give on parenting is, probably two things: One, it feels like this really karmic opportunity to do a lot of healing. And the other thing, it's a life of service."
While Timlin went on to say that any type of active service is fulfilling, feeding, clothing, cleaning, nurturing, and loving something outside of yourself is on another level.
"Being home with my kids is like the greatest, best thing, that's ever happened to me."
As her children age, Timlin has been able to feel a resurgence of passion for things outside of her family. This is something she hopes will inspire her kids as they'll get to see her as a more well-rounded person with dreams to chase.
Inside Addison Timlin's Relationship With Her Parents
During her interview with Michael Kahan on his podcast, Funny In Failure, Addison Timlin admitted that having a girl gave her the chance to reevaluate her time as a kid. Underneath all of her joy was also an opportunity to reparent a "younger version" of herself.
Timlin admitted that she first started to seek answers when she was 20. She attended therapy in order to unpack a notable amount of "chaotic feelings and patterns" in her life.
"I have chronic co-dependency in my life, and you go, 'Where does that come from?' It's like you can't be still and regulated unless the people in your life are also still and regulated and it can be so exhausting," Addison Timlin admitted before saying that it's a type of behavior she tries to "unlearn". But understanding its origin is also important.
Like most therapists would agree, Timlin believed that much of this stemmed from her parent's divorce. While she felt abandoned by the male figure in her life, her therapist opened her eyes to the true nature of her relationship with her mom. After all, Timlin was one of many kids in a house run by a single parent.
"I certainly wasn't abandoned and I had a wonderful mother, [but that realization] was something that really changed my life."
Timlin believes her childhood relationship with her mother is where her "people-pleasing" issue originated. Mix that with all those negative reviews she read as a child and you have a lot of potential for internal conflict. However, Addison Timlin has clearly come a long way. Aside from therapy, experience, and time, she can credit that to parenting her two beautiful children.
